Laugh out loud with this hilarious jokes

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1. A mother was bathing her 5 year old son when
he started playing with his genitals.
Son: Mom, is this where my brain is?
Mother: Not yet!!!..
*
2. A man goes into a library and asks if he can
borrow a book on suicide.
The librarian says; "ooh yes, but I need a deposit, because you won't bring it back."
*
3. And This Nepa will Bring Light Wen Someone Is sleeping...As If Someone paid For (Mtn) Night Plan. May Sense Locate U People Today.
*
4. Is It Safe For A Lady That Has Diabetes To Have a Sugar.Daddy??
*
5. Nigerians will go to burial, they'll cry and
still carry away food to their house. Chai, this world.is a set up.
*
6. Some guys can deceive eeh.. They'll be like:
''Baby, i see my future kids in your eyes''...
Weldone sir chairman of national population
census. Hope you're seeing golden morn,
pampers, school fees and other baby food on
her forehead too?
Am not feeling fine jare.
*
7. Some people are blessed with wickedness.. How can i beg you for salt and you tell me your mum has counted it...
*
8. One idiot used ''GUNSHOTS'' as his ringing tone His China phone rang in the bank today, for over 1hour now we're still looking for cashier and two security men..
*
9. I cried for 2hours when she told me she took 1st in her waec result.. Some people can lie ehn!
*
10. Miss those people in primary school that use
to say ''If i give you one dirty slap, you'll fly to
America''.. Come and slap me now oooo.
*
11. I don tire for all this Yoruba women.
self......Naso I wan go visit someone for
tollgate at Ibadan. On my way going, I felt
so tasty. then I saw a woman selling Zobo! I
asked her in English if its cold? I notice that
the woman does not understand English .
Nah so I come ask her in Yoruba ( in Ibadan
accent) that "Mama, soboyin tutu?" Nah so
d woman reply," Ori e lo buru, OBO IYARE
LOMA GBONA IWO OMO RADARADA YI, Plz
shey nah abuse I abuse d woman???*
*
12. A scientist wanted to develop a bra that stops
women's breast from bouncing while running
and also another bra that doesn't show nipples
when wet.
but guys don't panic... We killed the idiot!
I dey assure you.
*
13. Nigerian Girls love money, I'm telling you.
You'll get angry and tell a Girl, "Go to hell."
She will look at you and be like... "I don't have transport fare."
*
14. I just stole meat for my mummy's pot and
she told me that the number of comment I
have on Facebook will be the stroke of Cain I will receive pls guys help my career just like it and go.
*
15. If two women are fighting over you, abeg my brother watch the fight to the end and marry the loser...
You can't afford to have Floyd Mayweather
as a wife..
*
17. When money is involved, Nigerian girls will be like , I love his mouth odour it's so
mature.
*
18. I mistakenly step on a soldier's boot, when
trying to board a taxi.....the next thing I
heard was " are u in ZAIN".....something
was telling to reply no am in
AIRTEL
.
.
No God forbid ooh the devil won't get me
dis April Ending..
*
19. The hardest thing to find this day is to see a
girl without a boyfriend... Everywhere is
occupied...
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20. When you build a house let your wife decorate the ceiling, she has seen more ceiling designs than you..
Am I communicating?
*
21. If you want to be my friend, be my friend
If you want to be my enemy, be my enemy
Stop confusing the thunder that will strike
you.
*
22. Someone covered my eyes from my back
and ask me to guess he was .....after guessing for 5 mins, i removed his hands and i saw a mad man...... Bros, comma see temple run... Ustain bolt de learn for were i dey.
*
Did you notice i miss No 16 on the list?
Hhaa..You don go check am, don't worry it was intentional, continue from where you stop, thank you

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