To wait or not to wait

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What are women doing in the face of the disparity?
Many are taking what action they can. In the west, that might be internet dating: In 2016 the Pew Research Center found that 15% of American adults had used dating apps, and meeting online has moved from a niche romantic practice to the mainstream. In a predominantly Muslim culture like Indonesia, some are turning to matchmakers, or to events that offer introductions to potential partners.
But a bigger solution to the issue might be a paradigm shift, the academics suggest. Both women and men may have to start thinking truly differently about those gender roles, and what they want from a marriage.
One obvious solution is for women, men, and the societies around them (including influential figures like parents) to accept the idea of women becoming the major breadwinner for families, Smith-Hefner said. Such a shift could include women marrying men who are younger than themselves, or men who have less formal education. In order for that to work, societies would need to get over their prejudices. But of course, there are other problems than social judgement. People pair off for a vast number of reasons, and it’s notoriously difficult to change who one is attracted to simply by effort of will. 
More common, then, is waithood: A lingering, liminal state in which women and sometimes men put the next stage of their lives on hold because they’re unable to find the partner they want or are held back by financial imperatives. Formal marriage isn’t the only structure in which to have a family, and people are certainly experimenting with other ways to progress to the next stage of life, including not having children, or having and raising them in less traditional contexts.
But many want, if not marriage, then at least “a very secure, very committed, monogamous reproductive partnership” before they bring children into the world, Inhorn says. “Until that notion changes, and until people feel more secure being single parents…I just think this issue is going to be a global issue.”

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